My parrot is an African Brown Headed Parrot
. Her sex is unconfirmed, but I was told she is likely to be female, so that's how I refer to her.A few years ago I worked for a pet store chain. Although the store I was going to work in did not keep animals I was sent to train at another store where I met my parrot. This parrot was already a couple of years old when I came into contact with her and had been pushed and pulled by different people over her short life. Each time she got close to a member of staff at a store, she'd start to bite other staff, so she was sent to another store. When I met her I was instantly interested in her and I felt sorry for her having such a disrupted life. I could see that she was insecure and wanted to help her. I had experience with smaller parakeets as I used to hand-rear them a lot so I hoped I had the right attitude for considering her.
I didn't rush into the decision to bring her home. I kept tabs on her for a few months after we met, but I was told one day that the store was getting rid of its animals and she needed somewhere to go. After more thought, and another visit to see her and handle her, I decided that I wanted her in my life.
At first, she was very upset, obviously distressed about being moved yet again. I let her settle in over the next week, but I wanted to get her handled as soon as I felt she was a bit more settled. I began to get her used to me, and she bit me quite a few times at first. I didn't ever react to her biting me, and after another week or so she stopped biting. From that point onward, we developed a really good relationship and she really came out of her shell. She was affectionate, very chirpy and never bit me. My family began to handle her in small doses as I wanted her to be comfortable with everyone and not favour me if possible.
For a long time (about a year and a half) we were very happy together and she was very comfortable with me and even my family, including my partner at the time. I really loved having her in my life and I was pretty sure she loved it too. I trusted her completely, and I think she knew that, so she was good as gold and very laid back. I spent a lot of time with her, aside from having to go to work. She always had people around her even when I was working, so she seemed very happy. As soon as I was home she was let out of her cage, no matter what I was doing.
I never clipped her wings as I wanted her to feel safe, and also give her the freedom to fly around and exercise herself. I didn't bat an eye whenever she flew around my head or landed on me. It was all fine, until one day she did something I didn't see coming.
I was sat at my desk, and she was flying around as usual, chatting back and forth with me. The next moment I heard her take off and suddenly she had latched onto my ear and was biting it as hard as she could. The only thing I could do was calmly remove her by distracting her, although this took a few seconds. I hadn't much choice but to place her back in her cage as I was going to leave the room and didnt want her to be out and unattended (I know this was probably bad reinforcement, but I wasn't thinking clearly as I was somewhat in shock). I didn't say anything to her and left, and had to go to a doctor to have my ear checked as it was quite a nasty bite.
I didn't want to teach her that her attack was a way of getting her own way, so I didn't leave it long before I handled her again. She was very cautious at first as was I, but the next day I felt bold enough to handle her. However, I was honestly very shaken by what had happened and I just couldn't feel comfortable around her. I didn't want her around my face so unfortunately I stopped her from sitting on my shoulder for a while. I am sure this upset her.
It's been a long time since the incident, and I miss the relationship we had. I love my parrot very much, but am really upset that I can't find my confidence with her. I don't handle her as much as I feel I should, nothing like before, as she has become increasingly moody as time has gone on. I can only guess that she isn't happy and I feel awful for that. She sometimes trembles slightly when I talk to her, even though I tickle her head and get her to whistle etc. I hate to think that somehow she's become afraid of me.
My main question is... how do I find my confidence with her? Is there anything that I can train myself to trust her, and in turn, let her trust me? I am at a loss, and my relationship with her is nothing like it was. I miss her so much... and I feel I am not giving her the best life possible. She is probably frustrated and unhappy and that really hurts.
I know that parrots can be trained even after bad experiences but I don't know where to start. I feel like we are both a bit lost. I am trying to look at all resources online to give me some guidance, perhaps to build her confidence up and to discourage biting. Sometimes she will bite me when I ask her to step up, so I assume that she feels insecure. The more she bites the harder it is for me to give her the idea that I am not afraid of her.
I know I'm probably yet another 'owner' who is doing things wrong... I appreciate that I likely am. I want my bird to be happy again, and I want her to be in my life to the fullest, not just part-time. I'm afraid that I am not a good enough caregiver for her and that breaks my heart. I am fully aware that she is an intelligent creature that needs a lot of attention and I want to give her that.
I'd appreciate any advice/suggestions. Would it be a good or a bad idea to seek help from a parrot behaviourist or such like? I don't want to upset her by doing that. I have wondered whether it is down to her hormones too as she is only 5 years old.
Thank you so much for reading.
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? Food management not only helps increase training motivation, but also helps getting the parrots to try new food. You can also expirement with different fruit and veggies, and try cutting them into different sizes and bits, making the textures very different. An easy example is sliced carrots, which is so-so appreciated here, whereas grated carrots is a clear favorite!
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