Screaming?

[Calthesa]

Hi everyone,

So, I am beginning to think Pepper is screaming for me excessively. The thing is he only screams when I am home, but not in sight. I've experimented with leaving the apartment and waiting outside the door to see if he calls for me and he doesn't make a sound. He also isn't excessively loud (just normal chirping and stuff) if I'm in his line of sight.

But when I leave the room? Oh boy. He starts doing these really high-pitched shrieks the second I leave and he just. doesn't. stop. If I leave the room to put a bowl in the sink and go back out (I live a small apartment) for just a few seconds, literally seconds, I end up having to sit in the kitchen for over 5 minutes waiting for him to stop calling for just a few seconds so I can try and reappear without reinforcing the screaming. It doesn't matter if he's in or out of the cage either.

Now, if I lived in a house I might just use some earplugs and hope he stops eventually, but I live in an apartment and I'm starting to get worried about the neighbors. Not only that, but he's driving me absolutely bonkers, earplugs or no. I need to be able to cook without a splitting headache. I need to be able to take the occasional phone call in peace. I no longer think his calling is reasonable. I sat in the bedroom after just going in there to grab a book for over an hour waiting for a break of just 5-10 seconds in the screaming so I could try and reinforce silence.

I can't even try to reinforce talking or something because no matter how often I praise and even treat talking instead of screaming during these times, he hardly ever does something other than shrieking.

I am only gone for 2-3 hours a day for classes every weekdays (weekends are a little more variable) and he is out and getting attention the entire rest of the day so I don't think it's an attention problem. He's eating roudybush and a variety of fruits and vegetables so I don't think it's a nutrition problem. He has plenty of toys that he definitely plays with so I don't think it's a boredom problem. I have been trying my darnedest not to reinforce this behavior, even risking running late so as to not go into the room (the front door is in the bird's room) while he's screaming and trying to reinforce "Peekaboo" or "Come out" instead when he wants me. Whether I answer his calls or not, he keeps screaming so I don't think that's the problem.

I desperately need some help here. I don't think it's normal for your parrot to shriek for you without so much as a pause for breath for over an hour. I really don't think I'm reinforcing this behavior, so why is he doing it? How can I get him to stop?

[Pajarita]

My dear, you are looking at this from the wrong perspective and doing that awful 'ignore it' recommendation that most people would suggest in birdsites (and which I absolutely HATE for its inherent and complete lack of regard for the poor animal's feelings!). You have a baby, babies cry when left alone. It's as simple as that. Baby birds are NEVER alone and I do mean absolutely at no point in time, not for a single second. They have their clutch mates to keep them constant company and they have the parents which only leave them when they go looking for food for them. Would you let a human baby cry for an entire hour? No, of course not! So why are you letting this baby cry for you while you sit in the bedroom so as not to 'reward' the 'bad' behavior? What bad behavior is that? Because crying when a baby feels scared or insecure is not misbehaving as far as I can tell! And is it a 'reward' to offer comfort to a scared and/or lonely baby? I think not!

Parrots do not scream unless they want something they need and are not getting so ignoring their screams is another form of flooding because all it does is teach them to resign themselves to loneliness because no matter how much they cry for you, you won't be there for him. And that's not love.

[Calthesa]

Well, to be fair I haven't been trying to intentionally ignore him. It's just that all the advice on bird-sites and from pet stores and whatnot have been telling me to avoid going into the room while he's screaming so I've been waiting for him to pause and go to him only when he's quiet/using acceptable noises. He's also not usually that bad so the hour thing has only happened that one time. I do understand that some of it is because he's a baby, but I don't want to encourage screaming when he's an adult? I think? I actually have no idea what I'm doing here. There's so much wrong information about bird care and even "experts" don't know what they're talking about.

I just really want to have a good relationship with him and sometimes he can't be on me. I'm assuming it will get better once he can fly again since I won't have to actually go pick him up all the time. He can just go to me. But sometimes, like when I'm making dinner on a gas stove with an open flame and he's absolutely in the other room in his cage for safety reasons, he simply can't be near me. He can hear me and knows I'm home so why do I have to be within eyesight?

[GMV]

I'm not saying there is NEVER a good reason to ignore your bird, all i am saying is their are a good fraction of reasons its OK to give them attention for screaming, and being a baby or new to a house is what i would consider one of them. I give bliss attention when he chirps annoyingly, but he/shes still a baby and it is just instinct for him/her.
Most pet stores don't go through so much trouble for your(or your pets) happiness, the sad truth is they go through all the trouble for your money. (Don't get me wrong I know a brutally honest and wonderful pet store too)
Pet stores have really been starting to really starting to get my goat lately for these exact reasons.

[Harpmaker]

If Pepper can't be with you, like when you are cooking, make some personal noise. Singing is very good. Birds know it's you, where you are, and they aren't critics. Contact whistling back and forth also works, especially with poicephalus. Pois LOVE whistling. Be warned, though, they don't get tired. I established a whistle combination with Corsair, and we whistled reciprocally through a screened window one day for an hour while I worked outside. If I didn't answer immediately, I'd get increasingly frantic whistles until I did-but no screams. She just didn't understand that people can't whistle when their mouths go dry.

[Wolf]

When you must be in another room and out of sight your bird will call for you , have the courtesy of at least answering him. He just is insecure with being alone and want to know where you are and that you are not abandoning him. I answer my birds and I have no screaming from them over me being in another room. Mimi, the Amazon screams at times but that is from issues dating to her previous owners and not from me going into another room.

[Tman007]

I have started to know what mine are trying to tell me. From good morning to time for dinner and when they feel they need me to spend time with them and when it's to quite in the house. Have you tried to play some music for him when you leave him. I go to bed during the day and when I leave my birds I put on some music so that they have a little noise. I put on instrumental music that is soft. They even tell me if it's not loud enough. If it's to low they will still be vocal once I turn it up a little more they settle right down.

[Calthesa]

Well, it seems the answer is unfortunately "deal with it". I'm going to try playing some music when I can't be in the room. I'm also going to try sleeping on the couch when I want to sleep in I guess.

I've tried both answering his calls and ignoring them and it doesn't seem to make a difference? And I mean consistently for a few days at a time. I haven't been responding to the first call and then not to the second or anything. In fact, he screams louder and longer when I answer which really surprised me. I thought he would quiet down as long as I called back but it just makes him angry or something.

[Wolf]

I am not there and can only answer based on what you say. But, it doesn't matter what I think or you think about it , if the bird is screaming there is a reason for it. Lets start over and try basics. let's start by looking into his food situation. What are you feeding him and just as importantly when are you giving him what?

[Pajarita]

Yes, you are 100% correct, there are all kinds of conflicting information out there and the answer for everything a parrot does which we consider unacceptable behavior (most of what they do it is - to us, that is, it's perfectly acceptable and normal to them ) is, ultimately, 'Deal with it' (and that's why there are SOOOOOO many parrots given up every day, because people 'deal with it' for a couple of years and then cannot take it any more). But, in all honesty, I am one of the very few people who believes that paying attention to a screaming bird is the right thing to do - most people will tell you to ignore the screams until the bird learns to shut up -problem is, this smacks me as terribly cruel to the poor bird and, worst of all, not all of them learn to shut up! Some never stop screaming (I took in a cockatoo that did it for 21 years!)

Parrot are loud, demanding, messy, destructive, expensive/high maintenance, labor-intensive and time-consuming. It's the way they are and, although some of them are a bit better than others, there is very little one can do to change this but to redirect what we can and learn to live with what we can't.

Now, babies are more demanding than adults, same as in humans. A baby does require much more time and attention than an adult -that's a given! But a happy, healthy, well-adjusted baby will grow up to become an adult that will not have excessive 'unacceptable' behaviors - and that, I think, should be your goal.

For one thing, you should have a strict routine so he can get used to been alone at certain times -babies are always quiet after the parents feed them, even if the parents are not in the nest; and they rest/nap for a couple of hours at noon so it's like when you have a human baby and you re-arrange your entire daily routine to fit the baby's schedule and end up doing your stuff -showering, cooking, etc- when the baby is napping so try cooking your dinner after the baby goes to sleep (it's fairly easy now because it's dark enough to cover them by 7:30 pm -I turn off their overhead light at 5pm this time of the year so, by 7:30, they are ready to go to sleep).

Now, one important question here that has a very direct effect on a baby's screaming is: do you work outside the house? Because if baby is left alone for hours at a time every day, he will be more demanding of you when you are home than if you are there for him all day long. Been alone is VERY traumatic for them and some adjust while others don't and that's why you can't go out for hours and hours when you have a baby bird (or a puppy or a kitten or any other baby, regardless of the species). So, if you do work outside the house, the solution would be day care or finding somebody (relative, friend, neighbor, etc) that will come for 2 hours every day to keep baby company. But, if you don't, it's just a matter of allowing him to ride your shoulder while you do your stuff. I can do pretty much anything with a parrot on my shoulder (unless it's a real big one because they unbalance me when I bend forward), sweep, mop, do laundry, dust, emails, make the bed, clean the cat litter boxes, put makeup on, get dressed (they perch on the edge of a basket I have on a shelf in the dressing room), take a shower ((they perch on the towel bar next to the tub), etc. I can even cook as long as it's things like washing produce, chopping, mixing, etc, I don't cook anything on top of the stove with one of them on my shoulder but I can make things in the microwave and in the oven without a problem. My neighbors and friends are so used to always seeing me with a parrot on my shoulder that, when they don't, they ask about it

Parrots are not easy pets. People think a bird is low maintenance but that cannot be farther from the truth when it comes to parrots! I would much rather have a pack of dogs than a single parrot! Sheesh! I used to care for 26 cats and it was easier than having a single parrot!