Am I stressing out my lovebird?

[doryful723]

Hello everyone,

BACKSTORY:

About three weeks ago, I got my lovebird from a pet store which specializes in parrots from all over the world. He was 8 weeks old at the time and hand fed. When I picked him up, he was with other baby amazon parrots who were just starting to grow their feathers. He was the only lovebird in the cage with them. I am not sure why, or if this matters much, but I thought I would mention it. I was told by the owner, who is very competent and successful with birds, to basically use the flooding technique. 2-3 times a day, I should take him out and hold him for 10-15 minutes, and that day by day, his panic will fade.

I took him home and gave him some time, He is adorable. He is so sweet, and will sing all day long. I can sit next to his cage, about a foot away, and he will sit with his feathers soft, sometimes on one foot. I can even put my hand on the cage without any trouble.

I can change his food and water without him panicking, and occasionally open his cage to leave some millet in the bottom (which was instructed by the owner- a 2" piece at the bottom of the cage).

I tried to use the technique suggested, but it felt pretty uncomfortable for me. I would go to take him out without any fear, and he begins to go frantic, flapping around the cage, tweeting and running. He never bit in the beginning- however it seems only out of fear, once I catch him, he'll start to bite lightly. I hold him in my hands against my chest, and he will burrow between my arm and my stomach. Most of the time, he'll fall asleep and I can let him lay on my stomach. That is all he will do, and he'll do this almost every time I take him out.

If I hold him differently, like his head is exposed and he can see the room, he'll try to get out of my hands. I'll try to hold onto him, but that seems to make him more uncomfortable and stressed. His breathing rate increases and it's hard to calm him down. When he tries to fly, out of reflex my grip will lightly tighten, which makes things worse for him. I don't like to put him back immediately when the experience isn't going so well, because I really do want the experience to be a positive one. Perhaps that's wrong, too.

Now that you know the backstory... I am hoping you can help guide me to aide my lovebird in this transition from the store to my home.

1. I assume I shouldn't continue with the flooding tactic. Do you agree? How do you suggest I should proceed at this point? Is there too much damage done towards him?
2. I would like to reward him with millet, but it's in the bottom of the cage.. should I remove it and only give it to him by hand?
3. When he burrows when I hold him, is that him hiding? is he scared or uncomfortable?
4. Since he's panicked before and has tried to get away, what should I do at that point?

I know there are a lot of questions here, and a lot of the story.. I appreciate you taking the time to read this. I am looking forward to your replies and your help.

Thanks so much- any help is appreciated!

[Wolf]

I will come back to this and give you a more appropriate answer later, it is almost midnight and it has been a very long day and it is getting hard to focus. Please do not use any flooding technique on your bird. I am going to bed and will answer you after I get up, I just wanted you to know that your post has been seen and we will help as best as we can.

[Wolf]

I would not be being honest with you if I said that the forced holding of your new bird doesn't work because it does, but it does so because it teaches the bird hopelessness, that no matter how scared he is that you will do whatever you want to and there is nothing he can do about it. I find that this has nothing beneficial to the bird and creates an intense amount of stress in the bird and does nothing to gain the birds trust. With a bird, trust is everything, it is the basis of bonding and provides the foundation for everything that comes after such as training. A bird that doesn't trust you will not come to you of its own free will, it will run from you every time you try to introduce anything new into its life.
I prefer to spend my time in becoming my birds best friend ever, I prefer to teach it and show it that I respect it and will not force myself on it and that only good things come to it from me. I spend the first month not even trying to touch the bird, instead I talk and sing to the bird. I try to reassure the bird and learn to understand its body language and vocalizations. I offer it treats such as millet or strips of fruits and vegetables and sometimes a grey striped sunflower seed through the bars of the cage so that the bird learns that it can come and get the treats without being in danger of being caught against its will. Everything is centered on earning the birds trust, getting the bird to come to me because it wants to be with me. When the bird is coming to see me when it sees me then I start working with the bird with the cage door open. I sit in front of the door and talk and offer treats at the edge of the door. I do not invade the birds space, instead I allow the bird to come to me.
I make sure that no other animal is in the room with the bird and myself and open the gage door and let the bird out so that it can explore its new home as well as get some much needed exercise. When I first start doing this, I start about an hour before its dinner time so that I can show it me putting its dinner inside its cage. This will help to encourage the bird to return to its cage on its own, while also teaching it that it will always find both food and water in its cage.
This is how I start off with all of my birds from big Amazon all the way down to my parrotlet. And in short order I always have a bird that trusts me to love and care for it, that knows that I will protect it, a bird that will fly to me right away of its own free will and wants to be with me. A bird that steps up for me and all I taught it was the request because it stepped up by itself without being taught to.