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HELP - My conure only likes my boyfriend when i'm not presen

Discuss the methods and techniques of clicker training, target training and bonding. These are usually the first steps in training a young parrot.

HELP - My conure only likes my boyfriend when i'm not presen

Postby Claragonza3 » Tue Dec 10, 2019 4:05 pm

Hello! My name is Clara and I'm new here, I hope I made everything right

I've had a green cheek conure since he was young, his name is Chester and he's nice and cuddly with me. When he was younger (1 year old) he was mean to everyone but me, he bit and ran away from everyone, that was one year ago and at that time I introduced him to my boyfriend, as expected, he bit my boyfriend and ran away from him but, he was the first person (besides me) to pet him. It was weird because most of the time Chester would fly away, run and bite but sometimes, he would ask my boyfriends for pets and be as cuddly as he is with me.

We had a long-distance relationship so Chester only met my boyfriend like 3 times in one year and every time it was like I wrote above but, 3 months ago we moved together with Chester and I thought they would get along easy because my parrot has matured and he's now nice to everyone and lets them handle him (even ask for pets with some!) but my parrot has other plans.

Since we moved, he has only ran away and even bit my boyfriend and this only happens when I'm on the room with them or he knows I'm home but, when my boyfriend is alone with him, he is normally nice and cuddly, my partner bathes him and everything is okay and I have no idea why this happens.

My partner is a bit touchy with the parrot but always gentle when handling him, he gives him a lot of treats (he's a softie) and just loves him so much but he is getting so discouraged when everyday he gets rejected by Chester.

I don't know what should I do to make them get along. I know they'd love each other only if my parrot would accept my partner. So, my question is, what we do to make them like each other? and, why is this happening? I think it might be because they met when Chester hated everyone because he still hates the people he met when he was younger but is nice to everyone new.

That's all, I'm sorry this is so long but I wanted to give all the info that I could so this can get fixed, I appreciate any tips or theories and thanks for reading.

Have a nice day! :gcc:
Gender: This parrot forum member is female
Posts: 1
Number of Birds Owned: 1
Types of Birds Owned: Green cheek conure
Flight: Yes

Re: HELP - My conure only likes my boyfriend when i'm not presen

Postby Pajarita » Thu Dec 12, 2019 11:10 am

Hi, Clara, Chester and boyfriend. Welcome to the forum! I am sorry you are going through this but it seems to me that your are operating under a misconception because all parrots are one-person animals. It's the way nature made them. Once they feel comfortable in their home and with the humans in it, they will love one human and accept the others the way a parrot in a flock accepts its flock-mates but a flock-mate is a friend and not their chosen one so, although they will take a treat from 'another' and very sweet-tempered ones that are cared for the right way (and this means the right diet, light schedule, handling, etc) would even step up and not bite somebody who is familiar to them, this does not mean they will accept 'familiarites' from them or that they will be amenable to interact with them when their beloved is present. The other thing you need to take into consideration is that, most likely, Chester feels that your boyfriend is his competition for your love. Parrots are VERY smart and masters of the human body language and tone of voice so they can tell when we have a casual, loving or romantic relationship and, although they might not have a problem with a brother, a sister or a mother, they would with a spouse or a child of their chosen one.

People will tell you to make it so your boyfriend is the only one that feeds it, takes it out of its cage, etc. but this is not going to change the fact that you are his human, not him, and will only stress out the bird. People tend to think they can outwit nature but you can't. You can't change evolutionary traits through training or tricks - it's as simple as that. Your boyfriend needs to accept the fact that this is not his bird. He needs to be patient and wait for the bird to accept him as a flock-mate and that means no physical displays of affection to you when the bird is around and not asking the bird to step up or anything when the bird is with you or you are in the room. And be careful of the treats he gives the bird because unless they are not protein food (which is pretty much the norm when it comes to parrot treats), they will not benefit him. GCCs are mainly fruit eaters so they require VERY low protein and almost no fat in their diet (I am talking less than a tablespoon of budgie seed a day and nothing more) - anything else makes them overly hormonal and your bird is now two years old which is the age when they mature sexually (he is like a 17 or 18 year old boy, loaded up in sexual hormones) so too much protein will make him aggressive.
Norwegian Blue
Gender: This parrot forum member is female
Posts: 17440
Location: NE New Jersey
Number of Birds Owned: 30
Types of Birds Owned: Toos, grays, zons, canaries, finches, cardinals, senegals, jardine, redbelly, sun conure, button quail, GCC, PFC, lovebirds
Flight: Yes

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