Iago Hates My Wife. :-(

[TerribleTim]

My wife is convinced that my Conure, Iago, hates her. He is pretty tame around me, he took to me the first day we met. He will sit on my shoulder, sit on my hand (Although he tries to go for my shoulder still) and let me pet him on the back of his head/neck. But when my wife tries to put her hand anywhere near him, he bites her. I don't think he is biting her hard, more of a "Don't touch me" sort of grab with his beak, but she says it hurts and that he hates her. I need some advice on how to get them to get along better. She really wants to be able to pet him too.

[marie83]

I think to start with she needs to work with Lago alone, preferably in a room he doesn't usuallt go in so its neutral territory to him. Get her to read Michaels training blogs and put it into practice, explain to her that she mustn't react to bites etc. Ask her to do fun things with him when your not there too. All this will teach him she is good to be around too.

Eventually when she feels more confident she can train and play with him in the room he normally resides in (again without your presence to start with) going over all the training and taming exercises again.
When she is confident in that then you can be present too but she must be aware the bird is more bonded to you and probably always will be, so it isn't a good idea to try to get him from you, put him down and move away then she can try and get him, rewarding him with his favorite treat. It will help if you can give a negative reaction if he chooses to misbehave, not a punishment as such, just something that will make him think isn't a good thing. You know your bird best so it's for you to decide if it's a short sharp no or something like leaving the room for a minute so he knows he has his favorite persons disapproval.

Bear in mind it can take alot of time and patience and she may never have a really good relationship with him but he can certainly be taught to tolerate her more and allow handling. That said birds can and do switch loyalties sometimes, my green cheek was all me me me until I had to do horrible things like give him antibiotics twice a day for 3 months, then he favoured my partner and wouldn't come anywhere near me. After that I did loads of work with him and the splits fairly even now, he still favours my partner slightly more (probably 60/40 split) but I can do loads with him that my partner can't. All the hard work will pay off.

[liz]

Is Lago flighted?

Tell your wife not to make contact with hands. Hands are scarey because they can make birds do what they don't want to do.

It took Myrtle a long time to trust hands. Mine were the first she trusted. Second was my mother who's hands always gave her a share of her food. She bites my daughter's hands if she tries to touch but will take food from her.

[Shelby]

Marie83 gave some great advice. Target training is a good way for your wife to build a bond with Iago because it's hands-off. She can teach him tricks like Spin and Go Through a Tube without ever touching him once.

[TerribleTim]

Yes, he is flighted now. When I got him he was clipped but I let his wings grow back. I think it effected him. He doesn't step up right, he tends to lead with his beak.

I think she is just rushing things too much. It took me 3 days to get him where I could pet him. I think she moves her hand too close to him too quickly and he freaks out on her. I've watched him, he doesn't bite her. He just grabs her with his beak and shakes his head real hard while screaming. But she says he is biting and it hurts. I keep telling her she needs to slow down and not rush in so close but she doesn't think she is.

She is kind of scared of him for some reason and I think he knows it. It's funny because when we sit on the couch and watch TV Iago will always try to go over to her. He will climb down off me and walk across teh couch to her. I think he wants to sit on her. But she gets all scared and runs away. So I'm not sure if he wants on her or he wants to mess with her.

Birds have interesting personalities.

[marie83]

Lol, sounds like my boyfriend with Ollie, he is terrified of his beak and will do anything to avoid being bitten, but at the same time he tries to rush everything and wont entertain the idea of doing training with him himself. If it was any other bird he would not get away with treating the bird like that (he isn't cruel or anything, just scared of him) but try telling him that.... My boyfriend gets away with a hell of alot cuz Ollie is completely non phobic, if I had another species I would have a nervous wreck on my hands lol, I know I could never have an african grey around him for example
Ollie knows my boyfriend is way of him and plays up to that fact big style, he does things to him he would never do to anyone else (like attack the phone when he is on it)

[Khaiqha]

I would guess that your bird senses your wife's fear, which in turn can make the bird scared. My irn can tell if a person is scared of her with a glance, and actually picks on people that are scared of her. Anyone who is calm and direct with my irn gets her love.