Attacking and landing on my head, desparately sad owner

[BeckyPotter]

Hi everyone, my green cheeked conure Cid has developed a bond with my partner but not me. I was aware of the importance of creating a bond with the conure when we first brought him home; we both gave him a bit of space to settle down, waited till he was eating and preening till we tried to handle him and did everything 'supposedly' by the book (quite literally, we bought a book!)

However, in the last few weeks Cid has developed some nasty habits around me, including attacking me when out of his cage, landing on my head and attacking my hand if I try to remove him and fluffing his feathers / lunging at me if I go near the cage. This is really disheartening because only last month, I was training him to step up and fly and land on a perch - he still does this, only difference is he is more interested in attacking my hand that is holding the perch than accepting his treat.

I am at a loss and losing confidence with him. He loves my partner Phil to pieces and will happily be handled. As a result, Phil has 'backed off' when it comes to Cid's care, allowing me to do his food and water, and interact with him more, but Cid is adamant on attacking me at all costs. I have been suffering with moderate depression lately and lose hope very easily.

Please can someone give me some advice as to what to do when he lands on my head and how to stop him from fluffing up and lunging at me from his cage. I have tried feeding him through the bars with Phil out of the room and it works after a while - he stops trying to reach through and bite me, but the next day it's the same story over and over, and this has been happening for about 3 weeks now.

Cid is around a year old and we are his first and only owners, after having been hand reared by the breeder. He has a large cage with many toys and is fed a balanced diet of parrot food, fresh vegatables and a few pieces of fruit every once in a while. If you need any more information, please let me know and thank you for reading.

[marie83]

Hiya, welcome to the forums.

How is Cid with you when he is outside the cage without your partner there?

Also how do you react when he does attack you? Its important you don't react to him.

[BeckyPotter]

Hello and thank you very much for the warm welcome.

Cid generally doesn't attack me much when out of his cage, only sometimes and he seems to only attack my hands - he's never flied at my face or anywhere else. I don't pay him much heed, only to talk to him when he flies near me and make 'chirping' noises, which he seems to like. But when he's out of his cage, he makes for my head and lands on it, and that's where my issues begin because I can't encourage him to come off my head without instigating an aggressive response. When using a perch instead of my hand, he will step onto the perch and immediately attack my fingers. My partner has to remove him for me. Is this a dominance thing? Is he trying to establish himself as more important than me?

I don't go near him enough for him to bite now, but on the off chance he does bite he goes in his cage and I walk away. My partner puts him back in if he's out of his cage. I know I'm doing things wrong, but I don't know what to do after he bites, do I walk away? Do I ignore him or say something to him? It's hard because I have so little confidence and find myself getting upset when he bites, even though I know I shouldn't!

Thank you x

[marie83]

Ok it might sound cruel but I would tip him off your head onto the sofa or something is need be, green cheeks are pretty fearless so I doubt you will do any further damage to your relationship if your gentle about it.

Green cheeks can bond to more than one person so I think you can definitely fix his behaviour. Ollie used to be bonded to me until I had to give him medication, then he decided he hated me and loved my boyfriend so I had to work very hard to fix things. Nowadays he still favours my partner but he is very much 45% my bird too and I can do more with him than I could ever do before. So keep your faith that Cid will learn to at least tolerate you and be ok with it and may even come to favour you. Don't set your hopes too high though.

Its fantastic your partners being supportive of this situation and is trying to help you resolve this, that alone will help no end.

First off are you comfortable getting him out of his cage and taking him into a small room that he isn't used to? If not get your partner to do it and leave him in there. You can then go in with a good supply of his favorite treats. In theory the new enviornment will mean he won't attack you as you will be the only really familiar thing.

Start working on target training, it will give him something else to focus on (Search for Michaels target training article if your not sure how), make it fun for him. If he attacks you try to ride it out and not react by moving your hand, I know its hard to not move away or react in some way, I know it can hurt and draw blood when they catch you right, I've been there, but this really is the quickest and most reliable way to teach them not to do it. Theres no reward in it if absolutely nothing happens but he will very quickly realise its more fun and rewarding to train with you instead.

Once he has the hang of it you can target him around the room, onto handheld perches and straight back off, then onto your arm, straight back off. Once you have built you confidence back up and Cid is good at target you can move on to step ups. Start off by showing him his treat so he has incentive to earn it rather than attack you, fairly soon you wont have to show the treat first but ensure you reward him straight away to start with. When he has stepping up spot on you can then move back into the room his cage is in or where he usually spends his time.

Repeat everything he has learned without your boyfriend being there to start with, when you are confident you can bring your boyfriend back in the room. Carry on with the training, go back a stage at any time if he isn't responding positively. Keep the sessions short. Don't move on until your comfortable. Try not to show fear or nervousness, showing quiet confidence is good even if you don't feel it.

You can develop your new bond by training other things, carrying on with spending a bit of time alone with him and just generally making being with you fun.

Michael has much more info on the different aspects of taming and training, they are very helpful and clear to understand, I suggest reading them through when you get chance.

Good luck

[liz]

If he can fly use an open hand swat off.

You would not let a toddler repeatedly kick you in the shin. You would push him away and tell him no. Don't yell.

Two people arguing - the first to raise his voice lost the argument.

[BeckyPotter]

Thank you so much for the brilliant feedback, Marie there's some really good tips in there thank you so much. I will make sure that I am gentle with him when he lands on my head and tip him onto the sofa or something, just keep reinforcing that he's not supposed to be on there!

I have noticed that it's only my hands that he attacks - I'm not sure if maybe I did something wrong in the past and now he's threatened by my hands? I did an experiment last night; Phil and I were on the sofa and Cid was doing his usual hopping about all over the place, I just rested my hand on Phil's shoulder without paying Cid any attention, and when Cid jumped onto Phil, he immediately attacked my fingers, and I didn't even move or provoke him! So that's where the issue lies. He happily comes near me or jumps on me every now and again; it's only my hands.

Good news though; he takes treats from me now from within his cage. I'm now going to start target training with him, Phil's going to do a little bit too. I just need to show him that I'm not going to hurt him or grab him, Phil handles him easily but he won't let me near - I'm just going to take my time and be patient.

He is so very cute and sweet and I just know that we will make a good pet of him with lots of training and attention. It's just a shame that him and I seem to have taken a step backwards, I hope I didn't do anything wrong

[marie83]

He will make a good pet for you both. Your making progress already. Just try not to rush things or push past the point you are comfortable too soon otherwise he will sense your nerves.

Things can change for the better, Ollie is proof of that, but it does depend on how much work your willing to put into it, the effort you put in to maintain/improve your relationship once it is established and the bird himself. You can definitely put an end to the attacks though, just be extra careful of any jealousy issues when the hormones start taking over at breeding time.

[Shelby]

Sounds like he is scared of hands or has "hand hatred". Once he is targeting well and will target on and off your arm reliably and without aggression, try targeting him down your arm to your wrist and then your hand. Target him on and off your hand. Start with your sleeve over your hand so he can't see your fingers. As he becomes more comfortable targeting onto your covered hand, slowly cover less and less of your hand so he realizes that it won't hurt him. The more he does this, the more treats he will get and the more he will realize that your hands are ok and stepping up is a good thing. Just be careful not to overdo it. Don't push him to do it again if he looks like he could become scared/aggressive. Only do a few repetitions of this at a time and end on a good note.

This is why I strongly support training your birds to target. It is a great communication tool and can also be used to get them used to new/scary things!