How/why is mating ritual/dance physically unhealthy?

[Wolf]

It is really hard to say how he would react to a bird of a different species or of another bird of the same species if it were not of the opposite sex. If they were the same species and of opposing genders then it is much more likely that they would get along and even mate bond, which would change the current flock dyanamics and probably reduce his need for you to be a proper parrot. In other words he would probably stop being so bossy of you. Parrots are very complex creatures and some things must be assessed on an individual basis.
By the way I have another site for you to look over. It has links to several articles, I don't always agree with everything in some of the articles that I have read, but some of them are pretty good. I have not read all of them yet, but here is a link to the site.

http://www.avianeducationandresourcecen ... havior.php
I hope it helps and that you enjoy.

[DanaandPod]

Okay. thank you!!!

[Pajarita]

If he mate-bonds with another bird, he will not act the way he does now with you. Parrots are very smart and they know which side of the bread it's buttered. He loves you as a mate but he knows you are not a good one and that you are not satisfying his needs so switching his allegiance to another bird will prove quite fulfilling to him.

But, my dear (and I don't mean to alienate you in any way by saying this), although it's obvious that you love him, you seem to be actively looking but also dithering about getting him a mate and, even though you want the situation to change (and rightly so as it has become quite intolerable), you don't seem to be too sure about how to go about it even though we have explained as well as we can what the problem and the solution is. I know you love him and that he loves you but the situation, as it is right now, it's not good for him and you need to realize that your feeling like a prisoner is nothing to what he feels! He is really not a happy camper and his happiness is your responsibility. Now, getting another bird might or might not work out. Nobody knows if two birds will bond with each other. One can give it the old college try and look for the best possible candidate but, with parrots it's a matter of chemistry. So, if you are not sure about getting another bird and will not be able to manage having two birds, please don't pursue this avenue because he might hate the other bird and attack it out of sheer jealousy which will mean having to spend hours with one while the other is in its cage, locking the first one and then spending hours with the second one so, if you are going to have to work more hours than you are now and you already cannot manage a single bird, I don't see how you are going to make it work with two. You might end up with two unhappy birds instead of one. So, please, take a deep breath, sit down and think about this very carefully.

[GreenWing]

It's just something to discourage, especially with female parrots. A hormonal female parrot can be dangerous, they can become egg-bound and die. If Chance ever displayed any courtship behaviors with me I would put her in her cage and change the vibe - leave her alone, play music, and such. Then after a while I'd take her back out.

But this isn't a problem with Chance, thankfully. When a handyman hit on me a several months ago I pointed to Chance and said "We're nuns here"

[Wolf]

Kiki, does her little mating dance when standing on my hand, once in a while. If she gets in the mood to do the dance and she is anywhere else on me she makes a dash for my hand and does her dance then she bows her head and asks to have her head scratched. I scratch her head and continue with whatever we or I was doing when she starts this. Not a big deal. I know that I am not touching her inappropriately so, there is no reason for me to treat it as anything other than her just enjoying herself.

[DanaandPod]

Pajorita, Thank you for your response. However, I must say that I am even more confused now. I thought that you kept suggesting that getting another parrot is the best thing for him especially while I am not home to keep him company and have another bird to talk to. Now you are saying that it may not work and may run into attacking/jealousy problems as well as locked cage time while I try to manage divvying up my time to each bird. I know that I have posted about his controlling and hormonal behaviior. However, How do u really know that he is as unhappy as you say he is? He doesn't seem unhappy or stressed while I am practicing trick training with him or feeding him or showering with him or having him get exercise by flight perches or even when he is on the loose terrorizing my floor plan. You say that you have told me what to do...but I thought that was to get him a companion. So, now I am confused. If you mean that I should rehome him. It would be helpful if you outright said what u mean instead of dropping hints. As far as rehoming a parrot that I am extremely bonded to myself emotionally btw, but also he is obviously even if I am a frustration because i am not a propper parrot as you say... Wouldn't this be psychologically traumatizing for him all the more if I ripped apart this bond and suddenly gave him away after this being the best home hes had...? The other thing is... as we have already discussed, parrot ownership is something that is unfair to parrots. But, there are tens of hundreds of thousands of parrot owners out there....(I'm guessing many who are not even as emotionally attached to their pet) and to suggest that a parrot be rehomed after purchasing it...due to wrong chemistry with the owner... i.e., it bonding too much and thinking of them as their mate... well that just seems somewhat rediculous to me. It would mean that every potential parrot owner be prepared for the expense as a possible fifty fifty chance of loss. Not only this...but very very few people work from home! So what are the chances of finding someone who can offer a life style even better than what I am giving him? I know u also have offered taking him yourself. And, I have kept this in back of my mind thinking and feeling like he is bad off after all these correspondences... However, you also have said that you are a grandparent... and to be fair... and I know there are many older people with parrots... but, what were to happen to him or any parrot if you were to get sick? I don't think rehoming has been good for him. I believe that is why he came with such severe seperation issues from day one. Even if someone worked from home... would they really be spending more than two hours tentive indefinitely to him daily? With this sort of suggestion... then it would go for just about every single parrot owner in this world and on this forum. but, there wouldn't be enough homes for them all to be rehomed. I am so confused and mixed up that I do not know what to do anymore. I just wanted what was best for him. But, I I am trying to spare myself from a severely broken heart as well. And, would hate to think that someones post led me to it if it wasn't truly necessary.

[Pajarita]

I had just posted a loooong reply and hit the 'backspace' by mistake and lost it. I will reply tomorrow because I have to go get supplies for a new batch of gloop right now.