hi jeanne,
i have yellow crest also,abused,and feather chewer.she also react the same way the first day i got her from her ex-owner.she prefer my husband,step u to him very easy,let him pet her etc..
like what terri said,this will take time and patient.
i dont know if everybody agree with this or not but i dont put her in the first busy room(living room).i put her inside my second room(alone,without any bird since i find out she is really jealous and pluck her fur if she find out we taking care the other bird) but i always open the room door and her cage door also.she can always control what is happening in my house but in other hand she had her own privacy as well.she always climb down when she wants to be with us and come back to her own cage when she feel she wants to be alone.maybe yours is different but i find out since she had her own room and she also able to come whenever she wants,she almost stop plucking her feather
and yes you have to be consistant with him,show you care and you able to handle him like your husband.i do get a terible bite and my hand is not pretty anymore but its worth.now she also step up to my hand,let me to do all the things that my husband can do to her.but..i still her second favorite person and i respect it.i still can have a really good relationship with her.she will not give me her special whistle and i hope she will share it with me soon
dont forget to control her diet.cook and mash veggie is very important.aloe vera spray also can help to prevent feather chewing(if u worried he will chew again).
give him foraging toys(mine likes pearl inside bag and she will try to take them out one by one).
remeber:love,patient and thick skin will win his heart
good luck!