Hating Hands

[Dindey]

Hello!

I have a Black Masked Lovebird named Mango, he is my only pet bird. I've had him for a little over a year now and I seem to be having a reoccurring problem; He HATES hands.

Despite this, he thoroughly loves me. He will spend most of his days sitting on my computer desk, and will often jump into my lap and climb up to sit on my breast or shoulder, nibbling and kissing my lips and cheeks, and grinding his beak contently. However whenever my hands come anywhere near him he puffs up his feathers and opens his beak threateningly (strangely enough, he eats bread from my hands if I hold it out to him).

I try my best to avoid handling him as I know how much he dislikes it, and instead I do small exercices like creeping my hand closer to him when he's sitting contently on his perch, and retracting when he gets uncomfortable. Unfortunately his wings are clipped (we have cats), so there are times where I do have to handle him if he happens to fall on the floor or if I have to transport him back to his cage. He is tolerant and non-aggressive of my picking him up but if I keep him perched on my hand for too long he gets very upset, so I try to make the transition between point A and point B quick so he doesn't get upset.

I've tried helplessly for a year to get him to be okay with my hand, with nearly no progress. What can I do?

[MightyMidget]

From my understanding Mango would be safer flighted around cats, clipped he is a sitting duck if he lands on the floor while you are distracted.

Instead of moving your hand when the bird is uncomfortable, move it once the bird relaxes so it is rewarded for tolerating your hands.

You could also try target training Mango using treats he will eat out of your hand, then target him closer and closer to your hand then over your hand it might help, also try feeding him treats while perched on your hand so he sees it as a good thing.

Others will most likely have more in depth answers for you.

[liz]

A flighted bird feels more secure mentally. I am going to suggest the same old method I always do. When the birds is at your head level play tickle tickle. You have to teach him the words and to him they will mean only one finger. While you say it, wiggle one finger at a distance that he can see it coming. Keep your hand the level of his feet and tickle them while saying tickle feet.. Don't touch him anywhere else until he starts asking you for tickles then you can do tickle leg, tickle beak and so on.
Myrtle came to me in such a horrible condition that mentally she thought the world was out to get her. She would actually shake when someone looked at her. Giving her the security of being above me when she could not fly gave her more confidence. When she was able to fly, I became her pirate to land on and hang on. She was a year old in 2011 when I got her so it has been many years of work keeping my palms down when asking to touch her. She has turned into an excellent friend but I still could not touch her head or back. It is just recently that she has presented her head for scratching.

[Wolf]

I really do not understand the logic of clipping a birds wings, especially when the bird must live in the presence of a predator that specializes in the consumption of small birds. That would amount to the same thing as forcing you to live in a cage with wild lions with no means of self defense or escape from them. Please consider your actions and the effects of them on this bird, since flight is it primary mode of transportation as well as its only means of self defense. View things from the perspective of the bird. Your hand is the hand of a predator as are your methods of action, grabbing a bird is totally a predatory action and the bird is terrified as it is aware that it has no means of escape. The only other thing that I will say at this time concerning your bird and flight is that the ability to fly is such an intimate part of its life that it affects all portions of its life ranging from intelligence to personality, from physical health to self confidence and their immune system is not able to function properly either without the capacity to fly. Science has shown us that this single ability as an immediate and direct affect on every system in the birds body and influences all aspects of its life. I do not clip my birds wings due to these unavoidable facts. I will not tell you what to do concerning this issue, but I think that your choice is wrong and urge you to at least do some honest research into birds and flight and then base your decision upon actual scientific documentation and not on hearsay from bird forums.
Your game as described by you teaches your bird to fear your hands not to accept them and because of this I recommend that you listen to mightymidget's suggestions on the better way to approach this problem.

[Dindey]

Before you all jump to conclusions about my choices on clipping my birds wings, perhaps you should consider the actual situation (which I didn't explain, funnily enough).

I have two cats. Cat A is harmless - Mango sits on her back and nibbles her fur, they are 'friends'. Cat B will fall to natural predatory instincts and chase the bird should he been seen flying around. However, if Mango is seen padding around on the floor like a harmless lump of feathers, Cat B doesn't seem too interested. It's the flying part that really gets him going. Mango lives in my bedroom (I live with my parents), and Cat B is not permitted in my bedroom, and frankly has no interest of desire to come into my bedroom. However, Mango has a very curious nature and likes to fly out of my bedroom door/window into the wide open world when he has his unclipped wings, and there has been more than one occasion where he has had a near-death experience because of a lurking Cat B out in the hallway.

With his wings clipped, I can ensure he stays in my bedroom and out of Cat B's reach. I can ensure that if he decides to go 'for a fly' he is only a few feet away and I can retrieve him easily instead of chasing his fluttering ass around the house for the next hour because he's frightened of my hands and won't return to me. I've had him for a year and I've experimented with both clipped and unclipped wings, and the near-death-experience-toll is lower with clipped wings. That doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what is best for his wellbeing.

In saying that, I would very much like to have his wings unclipped and for him to fly freely as he wishes, but I feel that with my predatory Cat B on the loose, and me being completely unable to retrieve him should be perch himself high up (away from the danger) due to him not trusting my hands and not wanting to come to me, that having his wings clipped is the best choice for him right now, in this situation. If and when him and I get to a trust level where I can get him to 'step up', then I will happily let his wings grow out. Until then, Room = Safe.

If I had my own place (which I hope to soon) I would let his wings grow and I would enjoy the fun experience of having a flight-ful bird. I want to, I genuinely do, but I would rather an alive clipped bird than a dead one.

[Dindey]

To continue: I do appreciate the advice. I have saught advice from an avian specialist (yes, I went to see a vet) and was told that there might be no hope for Mango's mistrust of my hands. I have been searching for about six months for some advice and tips on this subject, from avian specialists, to consulting/messaging/meeting-up-with experienced bird owners, YouTube videos, TONS of googling, bird-tip books and much more. Believe me when I say I've done my research and have made my efforts, and that asking people on a forum definitely isn't a knee-jerk reaction. I knew I would get harsh criticism if I were to post my issue on a public medium (because that's just how people are), so I avoided it for a good while. But other methods are dying hard and I just need specific advice for my specific situation, so I'd appreciate the benefit of the doubt.

I don't 'man-handle' him like you suggest, I initiate picking him up with my hand around him (not grabbing, my hand hovering around him) and he instinctively steps up onto my hand, I then let him sit freely on the palm of my hand and move him to his cage, or back to the desk. I know that is still highly threatening for a bird that is frightened of my hands, which is the main reason I'm making this post in the first place. I am aware, concerned, and wish to do better. I don't man-handle my bird or hurt or mistreat him in any way, I am very aware of his mistrust and I cater to that as I need, while still trying to respectfully push the boundries bit-by-bit to try and get him to trust me.

I think the 'reward for tolerating' is a brilliant idea, I hadn't thought of that. With regards to treats, he doesn't seem to respond very well to fruit, but I might try millet or simple bread (he REALLY likes bread). Thank you for the advice, MightyMidget. I'll give it a go!

[Wolf]

I at no time said in any manner that you manhandled your bird although I did point out that grabbing a bird is viewed by the bird as a predatory and terrifying action. I also did not jump down your throat about clipping your birds wings, although I did point out some valid reasons that you might wish to reconsider doing it and suggested that you do a bit more research into it.
I have 7 cats and 6 birds in the house, so I am well aware of the scene that you describe with regards to cat B. All that I can say is that I keep a very close watch on both my birds and cats at all times.

[Pajarita]

The trick about keeping birds happy and healthy is to find solutions that work in preventing a problem (cat B hunting him) and still does not curtail or endanger the bird's wellbeing (flight which is necessary for both emotional and physical health). Personally, in your situation, I would get one of those door screens that close automatically with magnets down the opening and install it on the outside of my bedroom door. This way, you create what it's called a 'buffer zone' which prevents him from flying like a bat out of hell out the room every time you open it.

As to your method of getting him back when he is on the floor, if you are putting your hand down at ground level in front of him and he is hopping on it, you are not grabbing him and are, in fact, making him step up. Stepping up doesn't necessarily have to follow a specific way like putting your finger in front of his abdomen and him stepping on it, it can be on the palm of your hand (as you are doing), it could be on an arm or a shoulder (I've had birds that would only get on me if I bent over and offer my shoulder to them) or it could be on a stick.

Does he step up to a stick? If not, let me know and I'll tell you how to achieve this which, in turn, will, in time, lead to his stepping on your finger.

[liz]

Personally, in your situation, I would get one of those door screens that close automatically with magnets down the opening and install it on the outside of my bedroom door. This way, you create what it's called a 'buffer zone' which prevents him from flying like a bat out of hell out the room every time you open it.


I did this to keep the cat out of my baby room when I was over seas.